Question
I have been married for three years, but my husband does not have any interest in sexual activity. Is there a Hadith which addresses this?
Answer
Sayyiduna Abu Juhayfah (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports:
Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) made a bond of brotherhood between Sayyiduna Salman and Sayyiduna Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhuma). Sayyiduna Salman visited Sayyiduna Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhuma) and noticed that Ummud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anha) was shabbily dressed, so he asked her, “What is the matter with you?” She said, “Your brother Abud Darda is not interested in [the luxuries of] this world.”
Sayyiduna Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhu) then came home, prepared some food for Sayyiduna Salman and told him to eat, as he was fasting. Sayyiduna Salman (radiyallahu ‘anhu) said, “I will not eat until you eat.” So Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhu) ate. At night, Sayyiduna Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhu) went to offer Salah, but Sayyiduna Salman (radiyallahu ‘anhu) said, “Sleep!” So he went back to sleep. He got up again, and Sayyiduna Salman (radiyallahu ‘anhu) said, “Sleep!” When the last portion of the night set in, Sayyiduna Salman (radiyallahu ‘anhu) said, “Now get up”, and they both performed Salah.
Sayyiduna Salman (radiyallahu ‘anhu) then said: “Certainly your Rabb enjoys rights over you, your body/soul enjoys rights over you and your wife enjoys rights over you, so fulfill the rights of those who enjoy rights over you.”
Sayyiduna Abud Darda (radiyallahu ‘anhu) then came to Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) and related to him what had transpired. Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said: “Salman has certainly spoken the truth.”
(Sahih Bukhari, Hadith: 1968)
Hafiz Ibn Hajar (rahimahullah), the grand commentator of Sahih Bukhari, when enlisting the laws derived from the above narration states “A law which can be derived, is that a woman does enjoy conjugal rights [over her husband]…”
(Fathul Bari, under Hadith: 1968)
The above narration clearly indicates that a man is certainly responsible for fulfilling the needs of his wife. Failing to do so, will result in sin. Kindly contact a Mufti or Darul Ifta for a fatwa on this matter.
Also see here.
And Allah Ta’ala Knows best.
Answered by: Mawlana Suhail Motala
Approved by: Mawlana Muhammad Abasoomar
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التخريج من المصادر العربية
صحيح البخاري:
(١٩٦٨) – حدثنا محمد بن بشار، حدثنا جعفر بن عون، حدثنا أبو العميس، عن عون بن أبي جحيفة، عن أبيه، قال: آخى النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم بين سلمان، وأبي الدرداء، فزار سلمان أبا الدرداء، فرأى أم الدرداء متبذلة، فقال لها: ما شأنك؟ قالت: أخوك أبو الدرداء ليس له حاجة في الدنيا، فجاء أبو الدرداء فصنع له طعاما، فقال: كل؟ قال: فإني صائم، قال: ما أنا بآكل حتى تأكل، قال: فأكل، فلما كان الليل ذهب أبو الدرداء يقوم، قال: نم، فنام، ثم ذهب يقوم فقال: نم، فلما كان من آخر الليل قال: سلمان قم الآن، فصليا فقال له سلمان: إن لربك عليك حقا، ولنفسك عليك حقا، ولأهلك عليك حقا، فأعط كل ذي حق حقه، فأتى النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم، فذكر ذلك له، فقال النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم: «صدق سلمان»
فتح الباري لابن حجر: (٤/ ٢١١)
(١٩٦٨) – وفي هذا الحديث من الفوائد مشروعية المؤاخاة في الله وزيارة الإخوان والمبيت عندهم وجواز مخاطبة الأجنبية للحاجة والسؤال عما يترتب عليه المصلحة وإن كان في الظاهر لا يتعلق بالسائل وفيه النصح للمسلم وتنبيه من أغفل وفيه فضل قيام آخر الليل وفيه مشروعية تزين المرأة لزوجها وثبوت حق المرأة على الزوج في حسن العشرة وقد يؤخذ منه ثبوت حقها في الوطء لقوله ولأهلك عليك حقا ثم قال وائت أهلك وقرره النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم على ذلك.